| ***Disclaimer,
due to graphic depictions and strong language children under 17 not
advised to read.
Well sometimes I run low on ideas for the site,
I try to think of the next thing I'm going to do, will I add on
to anything, like I said I would, also will I try this time? Well your
answer there is no, but I do in fact hate, sooo much crap that I
am able to write one of these anytime I'm suffering from sleep deprivation and a little NyQuil in me. Tonight is
that night, I'm not angry per se, but I can fake it pretty well.
Topic number one, the lines at the DMV aren't
that long. Bob and I had this conversation; we really can't relate
to any comedian, I would say, ever. The process was relatively quick,
barring a few stupid comments that I'm sure he tells every day and
as the day goes on it gets funnier, but that's it, I was in and
out pretty much. So I don't know where the big wait is really? Me
taking the test was the longest part and that was all my fault there,
albeit them asking me to turn my lights on was pretty stupid but
besides that they did what needed be done.
Next up, now why do people think it's really
funny to yell some things? I mean I know that elevating your voice
seems like quite the comedic coup on my senses but stop for like 3
seconds and think about what you look like. You make me hate everything,
everything, even if it's something I love, hearing you yell about
it with idiots that don't care makes me hate you, and the thing
you are talking about.
Anyway I got myself one of those fancy little
digital cameras which are *gasp* the size of a credit card. Oh yeah,
"Indoors? Don't Stress. With Autobrite, you can capture bright
lights and dim details, so you always see the whole picture."
By that, they mean the whole blurry picture, screw you Logitech,
I liked you, I want to like you why wont you let me like you? Why?
I mean sure I drive a focus, it's no mustang or anything but it
gets me around damn it, I might not be too great at sports, but
I get nervous you know that, remember that one time at the tire
swing Logitech, you were all like "Promise me this"
And then I was like "Anything Logitech."
And then you were all like "Promise that
no matter what happens you'll always keep this night with you,
the lilly pond, the frogs, the ice cream, old jack wailen's fireworks,
and us watching the sun come up under this tree."
"I promised that night Logitech, We promised,
did you forget the promise under that willow tree so many years
ago?"
Yeah...so now that I might have made you feel
awkward, just by reading that, imagine us sitting in a room. Alone,
very bright lights and tacky furniture, and I'm staring at you,
that should complete the moment.
Wouldn't you think trail mix would have meat
in it? I mean what "trails men" made this up? And whoever
it was what was he thinking?
Well I have along day of killing Indians; I
better start it off with raisons, nuts, and some M & M's, those
yellers won't see what hit em. Really now.
Well I'm angry now, nothing like bad news to
get me writing a good "idiots." I also sort of have a
head ache, I never get head aches but sometimes I get real angry
and it can't escape onto this form fast enough and explores other
means I suppose, such as, the sides and top of my head.
Anyway, I'm listening to Rammstein and thinking
about what a terrible idea the snow saucer is, what the hell? 3 inches
down the hill you are backwards. Good design, sure they are inexpensive
but how hard is it to put little crevices that let you go down the hill
straight is it? OH WAIT IT ISN'T, SCREW YOU KMART SCREW YOU.
SO then I was all like K'Mart, or "BIG
F'n K," whatever, your saucer sleds suck, you can go straight
to hell, backwards for 3/4 the way, see how you like it you big
red son of a bitch.
So then I punch Big K right in its stupid head
and put it on a crystal sail boat and put it in the middle of a
sea of stars. It slowly drifted along that sea for many years and
then I found it right were I left it many years after that and with
my great fist I brought down unto it great vengeance and furious
anger with which I used to cast out the K and I allowed only a male
and female to survive so that they may pass their story of the sea
onto it's generations so that they will not make the same mistake.
That is how much I hate K (ghetto) Mart.
I also realized why I have been in a drought
lately I have been relatively happy, I am of course no longer, because
I think I like being upset more than not I don't know I enjoy conflict, and
that's why I'm going to issue a list of people, and things I want
them to change to make me happy. That wouldn't piss anyone off I'm
sure because everyone is perfect, according to them, "I'm an
individual."
Yes, a stupid individual and everything that
makes you unique repulses the rest of the world and it's not cool
to hold on so tightly to something you know to be odd just to have
it, let it go, join the crowd, if "everyone" likes it
there is a good reason you'll like at least some of it, we as humans
aren't too different from one another and once the world's weirdo furries
and Goth poets figure that out we can live relatively happily. Punks
you say you hate us because we are all the same, look at all of
your "punk friends" they look the exact same as you, just
most of the world likes being clean, so your the minority, if you
were the majority and therefore what is "cool" you would
then like it, so screw you, you whiny punk bitch.
I don't know if you have noticed but I refuse
to use the "f" word on the site, I think it maintains
a level of family and credibility on the site, I don't know, most
of the curse words or whatever else I use you can find on cable
I'm sure, so stop whining I don't care what you think, or if I use
the word "gay" don't be offended *cough* fair weather
revolutionary, get a life and stop trying to find things to be offended
by. Furthermore being gay isn't a more diverse world, it is a less
diverse world, being bi-sexual is the most diverse world, then being
straight, and then gay is in dead last, think about it for two seconds
and you'll figure that out, because you like the same thing as what
you ARE, no diversity at all.
"Ryan you can't say that." I can
say what I want, I can express my views this is a private website,
if you don't like what I have to say, read bob's stuff, it's better
than mine anyways, and he is more socially conscious than I am,
you wont be quite as offended.
WELL that's about all I have at the moment.
I'll leave you with this, hoping to not be too preachy but for those
of you worrying about reaching heaven, a little bit of it reaches
you everyday, it's your responsibility to realize that and utilize
the time you have. Every second you waste, and even the time you
wasted reading this you will never have back. If there is something
you want to do, do it now don't calculate the consequences if you
stop to do that, you waste time, and you forget the funniest part
is the way there, it doesn't matter, you can't second guess how
to live you life. Furthermore I purposely put some grammatical errors
in here because I think some things just sound better, so screw
you. Peace friends.
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